This is part 3A of helpful tips and methods on “defeating the Itis” pertaining to the daily fitness routines that many go through. This last suggestion that I have regarding when to go to the gym, is the one that reigns supreme in my mind. It is what I have been using the most and the one that I have found, works the best when battling the “Itis” and that is to go to the gym during your lunch break.

Pros to going to the Gym during lunch:

Going to the gym during lunch is amazing in so many different ways. It not only helps cure the workout “itis” but it also greatly helps to curb the work “itis” that many of us constantly face on a daily basis. It generates a true break from work and although it is a break filled with physical work, it is nonetheless a break from that constant grind. When I first started working at my job, I didn’t want to take lunches, because I thought that there wasn’t enough time in the day. But like with most jobs you find a great time management system to allow you to complete all of your job details on time and well throughout the week, as you strive to become more efficient – or maybe you don’t (who knows). Now, granted you are going to run into that project where there is just no getting around working 12-14 hour days, but even the eight hour day is a daunting one. Whatever the case may be, you are likely to be 5 times more productive if you break your day up by at least half an hour, when you are work. My problem: I was running myself ragged because I would eat my lunch in about 5-10 min, go back and work because there was really nothing else for me to do during lunch. I would not try to find ways to better handle my time and become more proficient because I never gave myself a reason to in the sense that I never really found the importance in a full 30 or more for lunch. So by going to work out during my lunch breaks I am forcing myself physically to take a break away from my desk, which in turn permits me to clear my mind and when I come back for those last 2 or 3 hours of work it is almost like getting to work in the morning – a fresh new start almost. I feel surprisingly rejuvenated when I return and definitely have seen a difference in the output of my work rounding that 7th-sometimes 12th hour.

The other amazing phenomena that occurs in this situation is that from about 12:30-2:30p the gym is as vacant as welcome home party for Bernie Madoff (thank god that won’t happen). I have personally gone to four different gyms two by one chain, and then two separate gym chains and all of them were empty at these times. I even double checked by asking the people at the front desk and they said it is definitely a trend that they see on a daily basis: come 12:30 the number of people in the gym dramatically decreases until about 3p. Just think to yourself for a hot second, you can wake up at your normal time, you don’t have to worry about going after work, you can get a full work out in, and make work a little more refreshing on the afternoon curve, all without really tweaking your day that much. Personally, I would much rather stay at work an extra ½ hour or 45 minutes and get my work out in at lunch then have to try and hurdle that brick wall that seems to erect itself everyday when the clock strikes the “time to get the hell out of dodge,” hand at work.

The lunch time work around is also perfect for people who like to get in, get out and get on with their lives when they go to the gym. For those of you who enjoy being in that zone when you work out, where every second is meticulously calculated out so that your break time and actual physical endurance time are in perfect harmony, this routine is perfect. I can sometimes get caught up in those resting periods during normal workouts, and although it is by little increments at a time, it adds up and I find myself being at the gym a lot longer than I really want to be. But when I go on my lunch break my eyes are on that wall clock every second of my rest period, and I fly through my workout. The time restraint really helps me stay focused and keeps my aimless wandering, that can easily occur, stagnant.
Even though this is my favorite option in fighting the “itis” I do realize that it is a very unrealistic plan for many. After saying that, I hope that the cons to this one in the next blog won’t discourage you too much from trying to give this method a try. Once again these are simply the opinions of a guy who has opinions about anything and everything, take it or leave it as you will.

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This is part 2B of helpful tips and methods on “defeating the Itis” pertaining to the daily fitness routines that many go through.

Cons to going to the Gym on the late late night:

The first con is an obvious one and that of course is being “out late on a school night.” It is perfectly fine to go out on the weekend. Hoot and holler until your lungs and adrenaline give out around 3 AM because you have the ability to sleep it out the next day and restore your REM sleep cycle back on track. But coming out of the gym any time between 12AM-3AM for an optional workout routine doesn’t necessarily work for the huddled masses that get up at 6:30 AM in the morning to go to work.  I am one of those people and let me tell you it took me a couple weeks of adjusting my sleep and nap habits to work around this schedule, which was a rather tiresome endeavor at first. But for many people they do not want to schedule their day around a gym routine. Instead they want to  schedule their gym routine around what ever else they have planned for the day. This plays on the another downfall which is:  if you don’t get a grip on juggling this routine with sleep, meal times, and personal time, then it is even quicker progress to the “itis” than just trying to go to the gym after work.

First, if you are not getting proper sleep and it comes 10 PM at night, guess what, the first thing to go is going to be that trip to the gym.

Second, if you are a person that is greatly affected by their nutrition cycles in regards to balance of periods in which you ingest your nutrients, needs to be somewhat strict, this will definitely throw you off. You can eat your three meals a day, but more often or not you are going to take a nap if you are a 9-5er so that you are not a complete train wreck. When you do this, even if it is only a two hour nap, you run the risk of working up another appetite after you complete your workout. And it is a well know fact that it is not good to eat right before you go to sleep. If you read my blog then you know that I never claim to be an expert and to tell you the truth I have done no scientific research on this. But I will tell you one thing, what I just mentioned is something that I battled personally for about a week and half to two weeks when trying to find my groove in this cycle. In fact I was flat out miserable until I found my “late night gym chi” and was able to finally center myself.

Another downfall stems from one of the benefits of going so late at night, and that is all of the janitorial work that goes on late at night. Because there are so few people there at that time, it is the perfect opportunity to thoroughly clean the gym without interrupting a lot of people at once. Of course anyone who is cleaning does their best to not disturb you while you are working but at the same time when no one else is there it can be quite disturbing to have someone going to town with the cleaning duties. The crazy loud vacuum that is used is definitely enough to throw you off. During the day there are a million other people and it doesn’t really bother you if someone asked you to move so that they can clean real quick, because you feel a little bad because this person is trying to do their job with all these people everywhere which is almost impossible. But when no one else is there you feel like “really,” all this open space to clean and you have to ask me to move from this tiny little area?” I am being more than a borderline ass by saying this because obviously the gym has to be cleaned but I know I am not the only one who is thinking it. To tell you the truth though this is not even close to being a big deal to me but I have noticed that some of the few people there that late at night are really kind of put off by the fact.

Obviously, this plan is not for everyone. But honestly I believe that if you are dedicated to the fitness lifestyle the pros out weigh the cons 7:3 – in my opinion. This route definitely takes some dietary and sleep adjustments but after about a week or so you should properly adjust and it then it should just becomes like clock work for you. If this option isn’t for you either, then hopefully this last one will be. Once again these are simply the opinions of a guy has opinions about anything and everything, take it or leave it as you will.

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Part 2A of helpful tips and methods on “defeating the Itis” pertaining to the daily fitness routines that many go through. This is the second suggestion that I have. It was something I was forced to do one day and I realized it was great for battling the “Itis” To go to the gym really late at night.

Pros to going to the Gym on the “Late Late” night:

The local gym becomes a completely different place late at night, especially if it is open past 12a or if it is 24 hours. The best part about going to the gym this late (around 10:30p or later), as you can probably figure out, is it is an utter ghost town. All those pesky little things that I wrote about so frequently during the “Do’s and Don’ts series” are almost irrelevant when it is only you and 1-3 other people in an entire section – unless of course you are the one who is committing these indiscretions. Every piece of equipment at your finger tips with absolutely no wait times. On many occasions when I want to go to the gym I crave that feeling of solidarity. The ability to be in my own world and get done exactly what I need to get done. Many times this desire gets lost among the mad house crowds, the ambient howl of busy conversations, the sharp clinking of machines, and the lack of being able to do what it is that you need to. It’s really easy to scrap a game plan and fall short of a new one if you are rerouted at the gym. If you set up this entire workout and by the time you are on your last leg someone is using your first and second options in machinery or weights, you are going to be more than inclined to skip it if you are in a pinch for time. But during the late night you don’t run into any of these little dilemmas because like T.M. “The World is Yours”, pertaining to the reality of the gym at least (don’t get carried away now). This is also perfect for anyone who is trying to get into cross fit type workouts because you have the freedom of using up three to six different things at one time because no one else is there, and you can’t be the ass that hogs all of the equipment if no one is there to call you out, right?

Another awesome thing about going to the gym on that late, late night tip is the switch up in atmosphere. There are only one or two employees at the gym and true personalities come out. At both of the main stream chain gyms that I go to, I have witnessed workers in their late night element and their normal hour element. And with out sounding too cliché, the difference is day and night (awful pun intended). During both of these shifts, employees are pleasant and nice, but during the day, you get that forged, almost forced smile and conversation with the staff that is written right into their contracts.  During the night shift people get real, like Chuck Klosterman, and it actually looks like they genuinely enjoy their jobs.  They are always doing batty things like dancing around and revamping all the equipment. Keeping real conversations around your workout and not trying to make what they say take precedence over your gym routine. They are helpful and offer a lot of different tips. This goes for both male and female co-workers at the gym. I have had this interaction with both. Grave yard shift workers of any kind know how to entertain themselves which from what I can gather makes them quite interesting people. I would think that you would be a little more reclusive if you worked one of these type shifts, but clearly that is not the case here.

Something else that I really enjoyed was that you let you entire day’s food intake have more than enough time to go through its proper digestion cycle before you workout. You essentially get the chance to work it all in at one time instead of splitting it. I can guarantee this is a mental victory and not an actual proven physical one, but I definitely feel more complete when I am able to finish a work out and know that I am not ingesting any more for the day, other than a protein shake to close it out.This state of mind definitely plays to the side of vanity though, in the sense that I like this because when after I am done working out and when I wake up the next day I know what my body looks like: it is not really going to change like it would if I ate two meals after I worked out. This might just be a personal satisfaction but nevertheless it is something that I see as being a positive.

The last thing that I noticed I appreciated about going to the gym late at night was the media controlling ability that you have. Because it is a ghost town you can ask the workers to put on any station you want on the T.V.s, any radio stations or Music lists that you prefer. I have been in there when I heard 10 songs in a row that I really loved. I asked the worker what type of mix that was and he simply told me that it was a CD that he had made. I know, everyone and their sister Jane (including me) has an iPod “so what’s the big deal right?” Well, sometimes I don’t feel like bringing my iPod to the gym. Sometimes, I feel like the iPod slows me down (on contrary, I also believe that it speeds me up a lot of the time) and when I feel that I will go to the gym without it. When that happens I depend on the music that is playing or the T.V. programs that are on, to get me through my workouts.  But this might not be for you, and the next blog might show you why it might not be for you. But no matter what, I believe that one of the four suggestions will fit your lifestyle.  Once again these are simply the opinions of a guy who has opinions about anything and everything, take it or leave it as you will.

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This is part 1B of helpful tips and methods on “defeating the Itis” pertaining to the daily fitness routines that many go through. The first suggestion I have, was the first thing that I tried to battle the “Itis” and that was to go to the gym before I went to work.

Cons to going to the Gym before you go to work:

Like I stated in my last blog, “getting up and going to the gym early and getting it in before you go to work can be an absolute godsend.”  But the kicker in this statement is the word “can.” I specifically worded this sentence this way to convey its duality, like a crafty politician or like the statements in those medication commercials right before the onslaught of all the negative affects it can have on you. Just like working out in the morning before work can be a godsend, it can also be that hellish beast that kicks you in the teeth when you are down. But one of the worst things about this particular option to fighting the “itis” is that while a large percentage of the time it works it can also progress the “itis,” in the same way that antibiotics can make your immune system worse if you take them too much.

The number one downfall to this option is of course, waking your ass up earlier than normal. I found that even though I woke up earlier, I didn’t necessarily go to bed any earlier, which poses a problem when discussing the burnout and its correlation with exhaustion. If this cycle progresses, you are much more likely to hit that snooze button and when this happens the gym is the first thing to go. You are not going to sacrifice the other things you need to do in the morning and just go to the gym, if you oversleep your alarm or keep hitting snooze. Let’s face it you are not going to substitute a bicep workout for smelling, looking and feeling awful at work. So lets say you skip the morning work out because in theory you have so foolishly convinced yourself that you will just catch a workout when you get off of work, you are still faced with the original “Itis,” because you never know if you will have the standard 8 hour easy breezy day or if you will have the dreaded 12 hour, employees in your ear every minute, reports piled on the desk that never diminish, day from hell. And so even though you set out to combat this phenomenon you end up once again in a vicious washing machine cycle of displacement.

Another downfall is the morning food intake problem. Many people cannot start the day with out a meal and for the most part they use this meal to boost their brain and body power while at work. But if you eat this meal depending on its size, you are likely to cramp up or feel like crap while you workout at the gym. And then on the flipside, if you wait and eat your food after the gym, you are likely to feel like crap because you are depriving your body of the normality it usually feels from the time you wake up to the time you eat. Vice a Versa you could be like me and be on the other side of the spectrum, where you can’t eat in the early morning because it messes with your stomach. Usually, you are fine because you start your day and have just enough energy to go about 3 hours without eating until your stomach adjusts and then you snack on something until lunch. This works fine for the most part for your work schedule (depending on your job), but it’s a whole different ball game when you try this and immediately wake up and go to the gym. You have absolutely no energy the entire time you work out, and because you have drained that last bit of energy while working out you don’t always get that “pumped up” feeling when you are done and you start your work day exhausted. So in this regard it is extremely important to find a balance as soon as possible.

The other downfall that I came across is gym proximity. Meaning that your gym might not be close to your home or your work and may be completely out of the way making it inconvenient to go in the morning when time is of the essence. I myself do not experience this but after snooping around and asking people about it like I tend to do, I found that it becomes a big problem for many. Waking up early to go to the gym is a problem for many but compound that with waking up even earlier to travel out of the way to get there, you simply have a mute point.

To go to the gym in the morning you really do have to way the pros and cons and see if it is a fit for you. It by no means is the best option for everyone. Once I started doing it on the regular it wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be. If this option isn’t for you then hopefully one of the next two will be. Once again these are simply the opinions of a guy has opinions about anything and everything, take it or leave it as you will.

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This is part 1A of helpful tips and methods on “defeating the Itis” pertaining to the daily fitness routines that many go through. The first suggestion I have, was the first thing that I tried to battle the “Itis” and that was to go to the gym before I went to work.

Pros to going to the Gym before you go to work:

Getting up and going to the gym early and getting it in before you go to work can be an absolute godsend. The first time I attempted this it was at the gym that was by my house. This worked out perfectly because I woke up got on my running shoes, some b-ball shorts and an old shirt and took off for a half mile run to the gym. By the time that I got to the gym I was in full alert workout mode and awake and ready to go. I got in there on a specific time frame and just cranked out a quick, smart and gnarly work out. I then ran back to my house, showered, hopped in my car and was at work with time to spare. I then realized that not everyone has the option of just running a half mile to their gym, so I tried it a different way the next day. I woke up got my gear on, grabbed a towel and a little shower kit – put it in a gym bag and grabbed my work clothes, strung them up on the car hangers and went to the gym. By the time I got to the gym I was awake from the incessant blasting of my music on the way there. I put in a full work out, showered and got on my merry little way to work and once again I got their with time to spare…allotting myself the exact same amount of time as the day before.

Not only did I get a full perfect workout in for the day but I went to work feeling like a million bucks! I had really forgotten how that pumped up, bliss filled feeling that you get from working out felt. It is a refreshing burst of energy, a natural fuel that powers your energy levels up and gets the body going. I have totally been missing this feeling because I usually finish my workouts after work and just go home and relax and completely shut down. I totally thought that I might crash later on at work but right about the time that I began to crash, it was lunch time and I ate a well balanced lunch and boom, I was good to go for the rest of the day – just enough of that fuel to power my engine until that old school steam whistle blows and then I am free to become a brain dead veg-head.

Another pro are the people that are at the gym during this time. Yes, you are not the only other person that had this flash of genius to hit the gym early before work. It is actually quite packed in the mornings but the difference is that most people there are in the same mentality that you are. They want/need to get in and out in the most efficient, physical and time restricted manner. From what I have noticed the majority of the people in there any time ranging from 6:30 AM-8:00 AM are all business from the moment they set foot into the establishment until the moment they put that final weight down or complete that final stride on the treadmill. Because of this people seem to be a lot more inviting when it comes to working in. In the morning if I am standing around a piece of equipment I find that people are 3 times as likely to immediately ask if you want to work in with them before you even ask than people working out later in the day or in the afternoon.

Another pro I found was that I was much more likely to do secondary workouts when I got off work. When I say secondary workouts, I am talking about doing cardio and/or working my abs, two things that I constantly neglect do to lack of energy or time constraints. When I would exercise after work I would not have the time or drive to add these onto my workouts.  When I would finish my workouts, I would think to myself “that’ll do” like the father in Babe. I felt good enough just getting in my workout, but if I truly want to meet my fitness goals I need to be able to incorporate these elements on a regular basis.  By going to the gym in the morning, when I get off work my mind state is like hey “it’s just about 20 minutes for 3 miles and about 15 min for abs and then I am out”. This is so much of an easier blow to my motivation take than my mind telling me that right after I just did a full weight workout. It is like the difference between being punched in face once by Erkle – not the actor because that dude is ripped but the character – and taking one in the face by Tyson like Galifinakis in the Hang Over. If you are looking to try and combat the “Itis” I really suggest trying this for a week. But this might not be for you, and the next blog might show you why it might not be for you. But no matter what I believe that one of the four suggestions will fit your lifestyle.  Once again these are simply the opinions of a guy has opinions about anything and everything, take it or leave it as you will.

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This next segment is a four part segment on a subject that I have brought up in previous blogs. It is a subject that can be completely devastating positive gym morale and overall fitness drive. It is a subject that I feel needs to be discussed in a little more depth. This subject is referred to by people I associate myself with as the “long-day-itis.” It is a disease that many of us face on a daily basis and although you might have a different name for it, no matter what you call it, it still becomes a detrimental factor in accomplishing personal fitness goals. “Long-day-itis” is a term a use to refer to that feeling of absolute exhaustion that comes over you after a long 8-12 hour day of grinding at the office, out in the fields, at the job site or at home with the kids. This little bug that is commonly caught by the average person on daily/weekly basis can be an extremely derailing factor when making that trip to the gym or running those five miles when you get home.

I personally hit the wall after a 9-10 hour day at the office and the last thing I want to do is go to the gym, but I try and force myself to make that journey because my physical fitness is something that I value very much. But if I have anything else that I need to do when I get home from work, the gym is the first thing that goes because I know I will be an absolute wreck if I don’t get some rest at some point. This “itis” is a creeper, and it can gain on you in rapid time and without any warning. For instance, about a month ago (before I initiated a comprehensive game plan to battle this) I had 30 minutes left at work and was really excited about going to the gym, which is literally about 2 blocks from work, the second that I got off. But when that clock struck 5 PM I got into my car and saw that the left turn lane that leads to the gym was just a little too long for my liking at that particular moment (which in reality meant that I would have to wait about 1min- 1.5 min – normally not a big deal). So I thought to myself “screw it” I will just drive home and work out at the gym at home. I got into the house and my roommate was eating a fantastic dinner and I thought to myself again, you know what, I need some dinner: I will just go after I eat. Well, turns out that if you eat a whole meal and a half from “Wings and Things” and work a 9 hour day and then plop down on the couch, you are pretty much guaranteeing that you are going to be stuck for the night – and I mean embedded into that couch like Wiley Coyote at the bottom of a canyon after trying an Acme flying device.

If you can’t tell by my blogs I am a very motivated person, especially when it comes to fitness. But scenarios like this one and others that tend to poke their heads about from time to time seem to take root within my fitness routines on a weekly/monthly basis. And if you are anything like I am one day of getting hit with this “itis” can throw your whole weeks routine off and in many cases you are not able to meet your weekly goals. So about a month ago, specifically right after I realized how much the disease affects me “on the reg” (i.e. the instance described above), I started to develop several different methods to help me curb this mini plague and it’s horrendous effects.  So for the next for the next four blogs I will be offering up some suggestions about how I go about battling this illness. With these quips of advice I will also be offering some pros and cons that come with each. And as usual I will have my relentless and unfiltered opinions about it all as I go down the line.  Once again these are simply the opinions of a guy has opinions about anything and everything, take it or leave it as you will.

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Phase Twenty two of “appropriate behavior at the gym: the do’s and don’ts, according to a guy with an opinion about anything and everything.”

This my friends is the final chapter of this ongoing marathon of weekly do’s and don’ts at the local or personal gym. I wanted to just to wrap things up with one last concluding strand of thoughts.

There are many things that I brought up throughout this lengthy survey/rant that I must confess that I am guilty of from time to time. Half the reason I started writing this ongoing gym critique is because I wanted to try and catch myself on some of these things and try and curtail my own bad habits and let me tell you, it has really helped. Especially in those situations where I am super tired and might not wipe down that last piece of equipment or might find myself dancing around or breathing way too hard, well not anymore. Now, this blog sits over my head and makes me think to myself “what a hypocritical sasquatch,” I would be if I didn’t practice what I preached and it makes me follow the words that I spill on these pages (or in this case electronically transfer).

In the process of doing this I have also learned that I am by no means alone in the category of some of the things that constantly irk me. I have also learned from speaking with, interviewing and surveying people at the gym that my own selfish actions (not following what I write about) at the gym truly do affect others’ work outs.  The funny thing is that before this blog I simply just saw the gym as a personal space that I owned because I paid for it. And when someone would commit one of these so called faux pas or infractions that I was so diligent to point out I would simply take upon the attitude of well obviously they don’t care so I shouldn’t care.  But I quickly found out that these people that have this ‘I don’t care attitude’ about how they treat the gym, are in fact the minority, so to speak. The majority of the people that go to any gym are 90-100% aware that the gym is a shared space and that everyone is there because in one way or another they too pay for this shared time in this communal space. This really came to fruition within me about three weeks ago when I asked to work in with group of people at the gym and they made a comment to me. He said “of course man. Hey, my name is Manny… hey man you can use any of these. I don’t own ‘em, you don’t own ‘em and technically, the gym doesn’t own them either because we pay for them.” For people like this coming to the gym is truly an experience. They go to the gym because they truly get something out of it every time they go. They make new friends, find new ways to work out, find new ways to make the gym a better place for everyone else and above all they are beyond happy. I know that making friends and socially interacting with people when they go to the gym isn’t for everybody – hey, its not really for me if you want to know the god honest truth – but it was the attitude that came with this that captured me. I realized that I have been infinitely happier when I go to the gym now that I make sure that I am more aware of everyone else around me. Maybe it stems from me laughing at people on the inside that make these faux pas (now that I am not making them myself) or maybe it really does come from the collective interface that I have received so much of when I survey people at the gym. But whatever the case may be I have been happier when I have gone to the gym and I have to ultimately chalk that up to my new found consciousness and reverence for the local gym setting. Being happy has, in turn, made me look at working out, not so much as a personal choir but as an all around micro adventure that I get to experience five to six times a week. Because it truly does become an adventure when you develop a full awareness of your surroundings and open up to the collective nature of the gym. Things tend to just pop out to you that normally wouldn’t and you then begin to take a real interest in the culture that surrounds you at the gym.

I hope that you all enjoyed this little series and I will be back with a new set of blogs in no time. As always, this series has simply been based my opinion, take it or leave it.

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Phase Twenty One of “appropriate behavior at the gym: the do’s and don’ts, according to a guy with an opinion about anything and everything.”

Don’t: take the most popular attachment and put it somewhere obscure

Like I have said before, I work out at three different gyms and depending on where I am that day. Two of these gyms are corporate chains (each a different chain) and the third one is the gym at my condo complex.
It doesn’t matter what gym I go to some inconsiderate enthusiast seems to complete the deplorable task of misplacing everyone’s favorite piece of equipment or attachment. At both of the two mainstream gyms that I go to, it is an attachment that someone is always taking and misplacing. At one of these two particular chains it is the rope that is always here today gone tomorrow and at the other it is the straight bar attachment that seems to always be on the missing objects portion of the back of a protein carton. I always just assumed it was me and that I couldn’t find it or that it was a bad piece of equipment but after hearing some comments I realized it wasn’t. Every time the rope or the straight bar is actually there and I use it (mind you two completely different locations and two completely different gym chains), I hear comments like “where the hell did you find that thing,” or “since when did they bring the rope back” or even “ah, the fabled bar.” So after hearing a couple of these comments I started asking the workers at the gym what happens to these items. Between the two institutions I was given three basic answers.

Answer one: people literally steal attachments from the gym all the time. They simply put them in their gym bags slyly and walk out, according to staff at both gyms.

Answer two: personal trainers use these pieces of equipment or attachments in weird obscure (yet effective) ways with their clients in different areas around the gym (usually areas that are open). I am told that they put them back the second they are done (riiiiiiiiiight).

Answer three: people take these attachments and use them on “oddity” machines in areas separate form the norm. Oddity machines I was told, were machines that lie in other parts of the gym away from where these attachments might originally be stored.

For Example the one minute rotation area of many different chain gyms, that is set apart from the other machines but contain machines that are compatible (but not intended for use of) these attachments. I was told that people often take these attachments over there and leave them when they are done. Two things then happen. Either “A” the attachment or piece of equipment just sits there or “B” a worker picks it up and sometimes brings it back to the office so that it can be put back (depending on if the office is closer than the original attachment/equipment area).  Both of the second and third answer made perfectly logic sense but the first seemed a little outlandish.
This brings me to the 3rd type of gym that I use, the one at my complex. When doing shoulder exercises I like to use the smaller weighted dumb bells and go extremely slow. Well, every other time that I go to do this at this gym the dumbbells are gone. I was always under the impression that it was the staff that was fixing them or cleaning them or trying to replace them, until about a week ago. This is when I noticed a middle aged alcoholic that I met at the BBQ area taking them out of the gym. So the next time I saw him at the BBQ area I asked him why he did that on a regular basis and his response was that he preferred the comfort of his own home. Of course his after response was “but I always put them back.” My thought in response to this was “then why the hell don’t you buy your own equipment you cheap ass! You live in a pretty nice condo complex obviously you can afford a set of fifty dollar weights!”

Do’s: put it back

It is very understandable that you take these pieces of equipment or attachments and move them to a machine that fits you best: I have no beef with that! It is absolutely unacceptable to take these things and remove them from the confines of the gym and it is just selfish and inconsiderate not to put them back if you removed them from their original area. How hard is it to simply walk less than a minute to replace something that you borrowed? If you borrowed your neighbor’s lawn mower would you not expect him to get pissed if you didn’t return it? Oh but I forgot… well, what good does his lawn mower do him if it is sitting in your garage? And for those of you who steal equipment from the gym, you are really just the worst type of person. Even if you put them back, you are putting them back at your own convenience. It is one thing if they are misplaced at the gym but it is another thing if they are completely removed – get it together and don’t pee in the watering hole so to speak! Does anyone else have this problem when at the gym, with people misplacing equipment or is it just me? Once again this is simply my opinion, take it or leave it.

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Phase Twenty of “appropriate behavior at the gym: the do’s and don’ts, according to a guy with an opinion about anything and everything.”

Ok back on track now. Here is another do and don’t entry about something that I tend to think does in fact have an effect on others around you.

Don’t: rest on equipment that you aren’t using

I don’t know how many times I have curtailed or rerouted my workout because I thought someone was on the machine that I wanted to work out on next, when in actuality they were either resting on it or using it as a seat to talk with a buddy on a machine next to them. In the good spirit of Peter Griffin, this is something that truly “grinds my gears.” Why am I altering my work out because you are using a piece of equipment as a seat or a conversation medium when others around you want to use it? This just doesn’t quite make much sense to me. I mean yes I could ultimately confront them and ask if they are using that piece of equipment or I can stop being anti-social and attempt to work in with them instead of just avoiding the machine all together, but why should I have to do that? If I am in a zone and am in that “ok what’s next mode,” I am going to look for the next available machine and if the one I want is being occupied I am going to go to the next.

It’s almost like extreme loitering in the sense that if you have a couple of “Jay and Silent Bob ” like loiterers outside of your store people are more inclined to avoid using your store especially if there is one right down the block that is loiter free. Which ultimately seems like it is fine to do but what if that store is the one place within a mile radius that has the Slurpee flavor you want and you are so put off by the fact that these people are always there that you simply skip out on that tasty treat, in which you are most certainly entitled to, because it is not an absolute necessity.

That is really how I feel when this happens at the gym. Sure, I went and used another piece of equipment that did the same thing, but the piece of equipment that I wanted to use originally just works the muscles so much better. This also becomes a problem for people who are very non-confrontational (even if the confrontation is a positive one).  I tend to get into this mode every now and then, so I thought that it might be kind of beneficial to ask around and see if this was a problem for some people. About 3 quarters of the people that I spoke to said that they would just ask to work in or ask if the person was using the machine. But that other quarter did not even want to take that route. They just avoid almost all confrontation or interaction with others while at the gym (which made it rather difficult at first but manageable in the end to speak with them). They get to the gym, do their thing and then they are out. Which means that a simple laziness factor on the part of others around them deprives these gym goers from making the most out of their time at the gym.

Do: walk around, stand or simply rest on your equipment

There is not much to say about the do’s, they are pretty self explanatory. If you are doing an exercise that requires you to stand, walk around after you do a set. Gets the blood going; it is actually much healthier to do this than to sit down. Don’t finish lifting and because you do not have a seat go sit on another piece of equipment and rest. If you are trying to have a conversation with someone while they are working out, stand by them out of the way and talk to them. Once again don’t just plop down on a machine and use it as a seat. Now I’m not saying that if you are only one of four people at the gym that it is not OK to sit down on another piece of equipment. I bring this issue up because I see it happen quite a bit during rush hour at the gym. And if you absolutely must use machinery (that you are not in fact using), as a resting bench be observant of your surroundings. If you see someone approach or kind of hesitantly hover around this said piece of machinery or bench that you are using a temporary throne, ask them if they want to use it or say oh “I’m not on this one, it’s all yours.” Don’t just be a “pud” and sit there or say that you are really using the machine (and “half-assing” some kind of motion on it) so that you can continue a conversation. What do you all think? Do you think I am being too anal retentive on this one or are you in agreement? Once again this is simply my opinion, take it or leave it.

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Phase Nineteen of “appropriate behavior at the gym: the do’s and don’ts, according to a guy with an opinion about anything and everything.”

Piggy backing on the last entry I am going to write about one more personal inquiry that I felt needed to be thrown out there and established. Once again this isn’t a do or don’t and it does not really effect anyone else, for the most part. This week I am going to bring up the “the man in the mirror.”

There is a very fine line when discussing “the man/woman in the mirror” when talking about the subject in conjunction with the gym. The “man in the mirror” refers to someone who is stuck in a constant state of checking themselves out in the mirror. The gym itself is a fortress of reflective obsession in that everywhere you look there are mirrors. But the mirrors in the gym most definitely serve their purpose. They are put in place to allow you to watch yourself workout so that you can make sure your form is correct, and they are also there for a little vanity from time to time (who doesn’t want to see the way their body is progressing). But my issue doesn’t lie with looking into the mirror to check your form or catching that occasional glance at yourself every now and then. No, instead, my issue circles around the people that spend more time looking into the mirror than actually working out at the gym. At first I noticed a couple of people checking themselves out a little to intensely (I’m talking like 3 inches away from the mirror and doing little turns and moving limbs and flexing), and I thought to myself, “that is a little bit too much” but whatever. Then I noticed that these same people were habitually doing this – about once after every other set. On top of that, I began to notice that it wasn’t just a couple of people; it was a whole group of them! At any given time in the gym I came across about 5-8 people who completed this act on the reg. Which in reality accounts for about 8-15% per gym area.

Check ME out!

Now, I am not knocking them for being a little vein and trying to check out what their bodies are becoming. I am knocking them because of their compulsion and flagrant demeanor in a public setting. I will be the first to admit that after a good work out I go right to the mirror in the bathroom (but that mirror is in my home not in the middle of a public watering hole), it only occurs once and it only lasts for a couple of seconds. I just think it is funny that people so blatantly gawk and ogle at themselves in front of complete strangers for elongated and continuous time frames. This occurrence at the gym really doesn’t bother me at all but it makes me kind of laugh because it is something that I just wouldn’t do. Your muscle mass isn’t going to drastically change from one set to another in its appearance, so what is the point in checking and looking every 5 min? It is one thing to look at yourself for a few seconds before you start your workout and then maybe once in the middle and then at the end. But doing this as frequent as I see some people doing it, seems a little bit on the ridiculous side. Then again, maybe it’s just me. Maybe I don’t quite fully understand the complete spectrum of the gym culture. I know that in many ways the gym culture stems from a level of vanity in the sense that many people go to the gym to keep up appearances or change them for the better, but this seems like it is taking that concept to a whole new level. I tend to think that most people might agree with this because like I said I only see about 8-15% doing this in any one given area at the gym. But as always I am really curious to see what everyone else thinks about this. Is it ok to do this at an irregularly increased volume because the setting is the gym or is it just common social knowledge to not be this obsessive about your looks in public? What do you think? Once again this is simply my opinion, take it or leave it.

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